Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Happy Birthday, Dad

At my rehearsal dinner

Today you would have been 64.

You have been gone a month and still I find myself picking up the phone to call you or thinking, "I need to tell dad (fill in the blank)". Just yesterday Hayes was playing with the talking Elmo Live Doll you bought Lucy and I went to get my phone to take a picture for you.  You would have delighted in him flapping his arms back at Elmo.

On Sunday we went through a lot of your things, deciding what to keep and what to let go. Such a strange feeling to see your journals, books, jewelry, etc spread out on a table. While it was hard to see so much of it, what really set me off was a pair of cowboy pajama pants. All the other objects reminded me of you healthy. But those pants reminded me off all you had to go through to stay with us for as long as you did. And it was just too much.

Today I am wearing one the things I took, a pair of gold stud earrings. Nope, they weren't anything you bought for me or for mom. They were YOUR earrings from one 3 the times you pierced your ears. I smiled when  I put them on this morning because they reminded me so much of your spirit and approach to life.

Driving the boat, Tommy style

So I will try not to be too sad today and instead celebrate you.

I miss you so much but I am very thankful for the 32 years I had with you. I realize now that while you are gone far too soon, it never would have been long enough.

Happy Birthday, dad. I love you.  

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